Plenty of things can go wrong at a backyard party.  The mosquitoes could be out in full force.  The steaks could burn. You could run out of drinks (which could, in turn, signal the unofficial end of the party).  All catastrophes, of course, but worse than these is the permanent guest. 

Oh, you know the type.  He’s the first to arrive, empty-handed as usual.  He stakes out the food table, and helps himself before anyone else has a chance to.  He drinks the most expensive wine in your collection.  He’s made himself so comfortable in your home, that people think he’s related (and in some unfortunate cases, he is). 

He’s still there after the last guest leaves.  (He’s ceased being a guest himself at this point, and has graduated to the category of “nuisance”.)  As a matter of fact, he’s still there in the morning.  You follow the trail of his belongings and find him. Passed out on your brand-new patio chaise lounge.  It’s the first smart choice he’s made since he’s been there. 

They really should tell you when you buy hip, comfortable outdoor furniture that you run the very real risk of attracting permanent guests.  It’s a risk that you should be willing to take.

Did you ever have neighbors you wouldn’t necessarily have chosen to live near?  I think everyone has, at one time or another.  Maybe it was the upstairs neighbor who appeared to be practicing for a grape-stomping competition.  Or maybe it was the guy with whom you shared a common wall, who thought 3AM was the perfect time to test the volume of his stereo speakers. 

Then you got older, and moved into a house, and thought your neighbor nightmares were over.  They’re not. Now instead of the head-crushing bass, you’re dealing with rambunctious neighborhood children who use your front yard as a baseball diamond.  On top of that, your next-door neighbors that are headed for divorce court.  You know this because of their nightly triple-decibel arguments that carry right through your bedroom window. 

Then of course you have those neighbors whose only goal in life is to be the Joneses.  As in, the ones to keep up with.  They have the nicest house on the block and the latest model luxury cars.  They are never without the most expensive fashions, on their windows or on themselves.  They’ve been secure in the knowledge that they’re the “it” couple on the block.  Until now.  You saw them peeking over their ornate wrought iron custom fence at your new patio furniture.  You know it’s only a matter of time until they try to top it.  That’s right; I said “try”.  That should keep them busy for a while. 

Can you really be anything but relaxed if you’re lying on a chaise, drink in hand, listening to the sounds of nature?  Exactly.  You can’t.  No matter what’s going on inside your home, your outdoor patio should be a place of relaxation and enjoyment.   

Once you step over the threshold to your patio, you can let your daily annoyances fall away.  Your boss, your son’s teacher, the bad driver in front of you, they’re all a distant memory as long as you’re sitting back, enjoy your patio oasis. 

Even though it’s outside, your patio should be furnished with the care and consideration given to your indoor spaces.  If you spend a lot of time outside, you’ll want to have comfortable, stylish furniture for you, your family and guests to enjoy.  If you don’t spend a lot of time outside, the right patio furniture might encourage you to. 

Luckily, times have changed since the only choice was a wooden picnic table and attached benches.  Now you can choose from teak, wicker, aluminum or wrought iron.  You have chairs that feel like La-Z-Boys, and couches that look like something out of a fine furniture store.  You have choices that may make you never want to go back inside again. 

And you don’t need to.  Steak tastes better on the grill, anyway, doesn’t it?